Tuesday, May 25, 2010


24th May 2010, Monday:
"By the way," she continued, "I'm STILL not your whore." 
"Sorry to disturb you at this hour," Static texted, "I thought about it. And my answer is no." 
Static checks her bank balance. It's abysmally low. She hasn't worked in nearly a month. She hasn't written in almost as long. Next month's rent. Next month's rent. And oh ya - next month's rent.
Phone rings. She picks up.

"Static! How're you?!?!? It's me, Chutiya Misra."
"Yeah. What's up?"
"So? Have you heard the latest about me?"
"I'm in Delhi. Working with Fantasmorgasmic Films."
"So, I have a job for you. Only you can do it. Also, no one else was free."
"I need you to write for the InternationallyNarcissistic Channel. Investigative documentary. Thrill, intrigue, shock, tears. Blood."
"Subject: Mangalore crash."
"Yeah man! Think about it. First on scene. Beating MyMomma'sAnMP Productions to it."
"Let me think about it."
"Money no object."
"I'll let you know."
"Ok. And by the way, all's forgiven."

23rd May 2010, Sunday
She lies sprawled on her bed, watching the news. A young boy of 13 is in shock. He has a mike thrust in his face. 'Beta, your parents and siblings perished in the crash. How do you feel?'
He cannot speak, he cannot cry, he can barely stand. He is of no use to the reporter.

In deep anguish, Static tweets.

7th Jan 2009, Wednesday:
Email exchange: Static to Chutiya Misra "If I'm reading this correctly, you want me steal SuperMoneyful project from under Esteemed Colleague's nosehair?"
Email exchange: Chutiya Misra to Static "I have bought your soul for pittance. Go forth and kick Esteemed Colleague in the groin."
Email exchange: Static to Chutiya Misra "I won't do it, you mammoth turd."
Email exchange: Chutiya Misra to Static "Don't lecture me on professional ethics, slut. I own your ass. I am King of the Universe. Hahahahhaha."
Email exchange: Static to Chutiya Misra "Give me my money, bitch. I'm outta here."

13th Nov 2008, Thursday:
On recce for the ThisWillWinAwards project. Chutiya Misra & Static check into hotel.

Chutiya Misra: Should I book one room or two?
Static: Errr...what?!
Chutiya Misra: (wink, wink) One room will save money. One bed, hehe.
Static: Yeeeeeaaah. I don't think so.
Chutiya Misra: Oh ho! OtherIntern was more fun. Why not you?
Static: Because I'd like my own bed. Oh, and I'm not your whore.


  1. Nice blog & good post. You have beautifully maintained it, you must try this website which really helps to increase your traffic. hope u have a wonderful day & awaiting for more new post. Keep Blogging!

  2. Wonder what to say about this post of yours...but yes feel the hatred and irritation for such obnoxious reporters...beautifully crafted!

  3. Thank you for reading in spite of all the curses and bad language ;)
    How're you doing? What're you up to these day? As you can tell, I am mostly unemployed.

  4. I like. Please be writing more such posts.

  5. Is this Chutiya Mishra someone I know?! :)
    Lovely piece of writing girl! Sharp.

  6. No, you don't know him. Thank your stars you don't :)
    And thank you, awesome writeress. Means a lot.